Being Single: The Good, The Bad, The Ugly

I'm sure at some point many of us have had to respond to this question. "Why are you single?" First of all let me say I'm always bewildered by the men and women who claim they'll just wither away to nothing if that alleged "perfect" partner doesn't show up, and fast. Is there really something wrong with being single?

The Good: Being single is a good time to try to understand yourself and figure out what you want out of life. It's also a time to cherish your independence, finding satisfaction in achieving your goals on your own. It's okay to be on your own at times. The pressure is off, you avoid temptation, and above all you don't just date anyone (for some people).

After a break up it's also good to take some time off from the dating scene. This gives you the opportunity to assess your past relationship and get all you can out of it. Focusing on your actions and rethinking your attitude will advance your future relationships. You also have freedom to have a good time. Make a lot of friends and spend time having fun doing the things you love. You'll meet a lot of people and make plenty of memories.

The Bad: I don't know.....it's hard for me to comment on this one. I believe the obvious of course is being lonely. Being lonely is feeling isolated and separated from other people. Some singles feel lonely because they believe they are different from others and people are indifferent to them or people are only using them. Being lonely and being alone are not the same thing. You can be in a crowd with others and still feel lonely; you can be alone and not necessarily feel alone.

The Ugly: Some folks love being single so much because they can hook-up with as many people as possible, no strings attached, no emotional attachments. (Unfortunately this still applies to folks in relationships as well...and that's too bad) If you're not careful, at any time this situation can become ugly and fast. When it comes time to settle, can this person really change and leave that lifestyle behind? Who knows. This is where that playmates and soulmates thing come into play.

It's kinda funny. I'm a member of the media and I wonder is the media partially responsible for the notion that there's something wrong with being single? Look around you. Whether you visit a bookstore or a library, watch television, go to the movies, listen to friends and family, adopt the values of society, or read the newspaper, you always see messages about couples prevailing. Little is spoken about being single, except as a condition to avoid like the plague.

It's all relative....I'm single myself... would I like to be in a relationship? Of course I would. Am I beating myself up, depressed or dissatisfied because I'm single....hell no, I still have a life to live. I do believe that special someone is close. Only time will tell.

One last thing.....if you really feel lonely, I do have this advice for you: draw near to God. He should be the one you turn to when the dating life deals you a bad hand. If you trust in Him whether single or dating He will see you through.

Until next time America.